Buy This Beavis And Butt-Head Sculpture Now
By now I'm sure that most of you have heard about the Florida woman who caused a two-vehicle wreck because she was shaving her bikini area while driving.
Guess that makes the time you drove with your elbows while eating a Whopper seem downright virtuous, doesn't it?
Florida Highway Patrol troopers said the car Megan Barnes was driving crashed into the back of a pickup truck at about 45 mph. Her reaction time was slowed down because she was too busy grooming her hoohah to pay attention to the road. Oh, like that's never happened to you?
Ms. Barnes told the investigating officer that she was on her way to a date and "wanted to be ready for the visit."
Yes, she wanted to look her best. All over. Except, well, we've seen Ms. Barnes' mug shot and she appears to have a face that would stop a clock and raise hell with small watches, bless her heart. To be blunt, I don't think a perfectly groomed love rug could possibly make that much difference.
It could've been worse, I suppose. Ms. Barnes could've been waxing her bikini area as she drove along in her T-bird (Yes, fun, fun, fun till the po-lice took her T-bird awaaaaaayy) on those scenic bridges. Imagine the horror if she'd tossed the used wax strips out the window. The manatees might have tried to adopt them.
Hons, I've driven on this particular stretch of highway between Miami and Key West and it's flat-out beautiful with crystal blue water, gorgeous mangroves and cloudless skies.
Not once have I been so bored that I decided I'd rather drag a sharp blade over my nether regions just to have something to do.
There are so many "You might be a redneck if" elements to the story of Megan Barnes, but my favorite is that, while performing this extremely personal grooming ritual, she asked her EX HUSBAND to steer the car so she could concentrate ("Help me out, Buford, I'm gonna make it look like a LIGHTNING BOLT!")
What a guy! Not only did he hold the steering wheel so she could concentrate on primping for her big date with ANOTHER MAN, but when the cops arrived, he tried to switch places and claim he'd been driving.
Trouble was, he had burns on his chest from the airbag that had deployed on THE PASSENGER SIDE ONLY. Oops.
To no one's particular surprise, the Highway Patrol quickly discovered that Ms. Barnes didn't have a valid driver's license. Oh, and, the day before, she'd been convicted of DUI and driving with a suspended license. Oh, and her car had been seized and had no insurance or registration. Oh, and she was on probation. Oh, and SHE'S A FLIPPIN' LUNATIC!
Albeit an impeccably groomed one.
Celia Rivenbark's newest book, "You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning," is available nationwide. Visit www.celiarivenbark.com for details.
OK - This has got to be a record breaker for absurdities...
Fed up with what he views as crappy treatment from the TSA, the owner of a restaurant near Seattle-Tacoma International Airport has decided to put all TSA agents on his No-Eat List.
"We have posted signs on our doors basically saying that they aren't allowed to come into our business," one employee tells travel journalist Christopher Elliott. "We have the right to refuse service to anyone."
She says that whenever a TSA agent attempts to dine at the restaurant, "we turn our backs and completely ignore them, and tell them to leave... Their kind aren't welcomed in our establishment."
The restaurant claims that 90% of its patrons are in agreement with their stance and that the local police have actually helped escort TSA workers of the premises.
"Until TSA agents start treating us with the respect and dignity that we deserve, then things will change for them in the private sector," says the employee.
Business bans TSA agents - will more follow? [Elliott.org]
More About:From ConsumerReports.org:
Right on!
Charts, maps and infographics
Daily chart
Daily chart: Global alcohol consumption
Drinking habits
Feb 14th 2011, 13:01 by The Economist online
A map of world alcohol consumption
THE world drank the equivalent of 6.1 litres of pure alcohol per person in 2005, according to a report from the World Health Organisation published on February 11th. The biggest boozers are mostly found in Europe and in the former Soviet states. Moldovans are the most bibulous, getting through 18.2 litres each, nearly 2 litres more than the Czechs in second place. Over 10 litres of a Moldovan's annual intake is reckoned to be 'unrecorded' home-brewed liquor, making it particularly harmful to health. Such moonshine accounts for almost 30% of the world's drinking. The WHO estimates that alcohol results in 2.5m deaths a year, more than AIDS or tuberculosis. In Russia and its former satellite states one in five male deaths is caused by drink.
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Zambino wrote:Feb 14th 2011 1:09 GMTSo, the conclusion being that not only have Australians lost the ability to play test cricket, but they don't even know how to drink properly anymore.
Kunkka wrote:Feb 14th 2011 1:48 GMTI think there is a geographical reason for the alcohol problem. The Russia who drink most alcohol according to the report live in a very cold place of the world. They had to drink hard drinks in order to keep themselves warm in the past,and the drinking habit has become a tradition now. I think it is also one of the reasons why the people live near the equator drink much less alcohol.
Bob the builder wrote:Feb 14th 2011 1:50 GMTThe topic of debate on facebook is now why Sweden and Norway are letting the side down
mr.bungle wrote:Feb 14th 2011 1:59 GMTThe chart shows consumption by people aged 15+. So I guess it means total sales divided by population of 15+. So this is grossly misleading. In Eastern Europe we start drinking at the age of 8, so if you divided the consumption by the total number of actual consumers, we wouldn't be in the red zone. We are healthier than the chart shows ;-)
ISEE wrote:Feb 14th 2011 2:00 GMTNorthern Chinese drink pretty hard with hard liquor. South drink lightly. There seems a pattern here.
rarcher20 wrote:Feb 14th 2011 2:01 GMT@kunkka
I dont think you can draw that conclussion. Canada and parts of the US get pretty cold and they didnt rank that high. Plus, look at Portugal, warm weather big drinker.
Fadeaway wrote:Feb 14th 2011 2:14 GMTmmmmmm good data so I am from Jordan and We don't play Football well, suck at the Olympics, have absolutely no show in Global Music and Arts, still are on the first steps in democracy, and now are also grouped with the (2.5 or Less) in alcohol ??? - We get the Kids meal in alcoholic drinking :) "Them Jordanians, they are still learning how to drink :)"
1 in 5 in Russia and the CIS countries die of alcohol. Isn't that a little too high? Source Please, thank you.
LaContra wrote:Feb 14th 2011 2:18 GMTWhy Sweden and Norway are letting the side down?
Have you ever bought liquor at one of their Systembolaget or a Vinmonopolet stores (respectively)?
The Governments run a monopoly on alcohol sales (anything over 3%) to keep the prices extortionate and supposedly to help keep abuse down! Outrageous prices and restricted store operating hours to boot!I suppose if they use pure alcohol as the measure then the Australian preference for wine and beer rather than hard liquor might explain their poor showing on the map (but not their lousy cricket performance!)
So come to Ukraine where a litre of the best premium domestic vodka, Khortitsa, costs 28uah ($3.50 or 2.60euro)....
That's cheaper than Perrier Water!
(Vodka is even cheaper in Russia...but really, Ukrainian Vodka is superior)
LaContra wrote:Feb 14th 2011 2:24 GMTfadeaway.
I think the 1 in 5 figure may include alcohol related accidents and mishaps...when one takes into account drink driving, men who fall asleep drunk outside in winter and freeze to death, and alcohol related deaths in the workplace, then 20% is not unlikely at all
Michael Dunne wrote:Feb 14th 2011 2:48 GMTFor the inhabitants near the equator, maybe it is an urban middle class vs rurual or poor? Just speculating here.
I seem to recall that the Peruvians drank their share at the clubs in San Miguel, Mira Flores, Barranco, Monterrico, etc.
Also, I recalled Brazilians drinking quite a bit, and that comes from trips down there both in June/July time frames as well as around New Years.
Good to see the US lower than Europe. Seems like Europeans were once big on harping on how they didn't drink to get drunk (until Binge Britannia could no longer be kept out of sight, or remembered the Russians, Finns, Irish, October Fest, etc.).
Matt Andersson wrote:Feb 14th 2011 3:01 GMTSirs,
Well, according to the map, the Middle East is good for something other than oil and war!
Of course, it would be interesting to overlay the map with opium production, prescription drug abuse, tobacco usage and saturated fat intake.
Regards.
F1scalHawk wrote:Feb 14th 2011 3:05 GMT-Muslims are the abstemious.
-Poor can’t buy much alcohol.
-Caucasians drink like there is no tomorrow.
-Wealth=>drinkMongolongo wrote:Feb 14th 2011 3:06 GMTAlcohol affects people and etnicities differently. The inuit in Greenland have a huge problem with alcohol, and judging by their consumption per person, they do not seem so. Compare sake and vodka in terms of their actual alcohol content... countries in red are not drunks, they can just hold their liquor better than the rest - so they need more for the same effect! -.
Ok, being a red country is not healthy but I think we should point out that despite this we remain fully functioning individuals, by and large.
luso_star wrote:Feb 14th 2011 3:24 GMTI would like to see a chart representing the correlation between the quantity of pure alcohol drunk by person and the life expectancy in that country.
Maybe we would conclude : the more you drink the more you live!
Stebillan wrote:Feb 14th 2011 3:38 GMTSeems then that there is no correlation between the amount of alcohol consumed and economic and political development. In much of South America, drinking is prohibited during elections and look at the lot we have in charge in Bolivia, Ecuador, and Venezuela.
Faedrus wrote:Feb 14th 2011 3:55 GMTInteresting stuff.
One next step, and a relatively easy one at that, would be to run correlations on the data.
As mentioned in earlier comments, possible correlations look pretty simple to start, and appear to include:
- Avg. daily temperature/length of winters.
- Medium incomes.
- Being Russian (or Slavic).
- Local dominant religion (Islam, Hindu, Christian, Buddhist)
- Ability of local populations to metabolically process alcohol.Just looking broadly at the data, the above indicators appear to explain much of the variance within the map.
JGradus wrote:Feb 14th 2011 4:31 GMTI need to move home to Sweden and get us proper into the red.
augwhite wrote:Feb 14th 2011 5:00 GMTWhat happened in Iceland? Years ago, Iceland was famous for alcoholism. Here, it shows up as practically tea-total by northern hemisphere standards.
amadisdegaula wrote:Feb 14th 2011 5:29 GMTI suppose that is not what WHO meant, but as far as I can tell from this chart, alcohol consumption is actually a force for good. I for one would be the first to produce less and become more unhappy
egeli wrote:Feb 14th 2011 5:33 GMTTurks drink the most in the Muslim world.
Ken Olsen, a hero of his generation, failed to foresee the rise of the microcomputer. Photograph: Stephan Savoia/AP
Ken Olsen, who has died aged 84, drove the second great wave of computing, taking the industry from large mainframes to networks of smaller, cheaper minicomputers that could be used by small companies or scientists and engineers. Digital Equipment Corporation (DEC), which he co-founded in 1957, grew into the world's second-largest computer company, with more than 100,000 employees and a peak turnover of $14bn. In 1986 a Fortune magazine cover story called Olsen "arguably the most successful entrepreneur in the history of American business".
Just six years later, however, he was forced out of the company. The market had moved on to microcomputers such as the IBM PC, launched in 1981, and DEC was rapidly being left behind.
Olsen, who had been the hero of a generation of computer engineers, became better known for his gaffes. These included saying that "the personal computer will fall flat on its face in business", and in 1977, somewhat out of context: "There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home."
In 1998 Olsen suffered the ignominy of seeing his beloved company taken over by Compaq, one of the upstart PC manufacturers, for $9.6bn, then absorbed into a former rival, Hewlett-Packard. Although he had severed relations with DEC in 1992, its downfall was painful for him.
DEC had developed its own PC, the Rainbow, but it did not follow IBM's standards and sold badly. DEC was positioned to do well out of the growing importance of communications, and its computers were used to run much of the early internet, but it often lost out to Sun Microsystems. Bill Gates wrote his version of Basic – used to found Microsoft – on a DEC computer, and later Dave Cutler, DEC's star programmer, took his team to Microsoft to write Windows NT, the basis for XP. DEC even created Alta Vista, the web's leading search engine until Google arrived. There were other missed opportunities. DEC had the talent but, outside minicomputing, was never able to convert its innovations into substantial businesses.
Olsen was born in Bridgeport, Connecticut, to parents of Norwegian and Swedish descent, and developed a schoolboy interest in electronics, particularly radio. His father was a mechanical inventor with a workshop in the basement, where Ken and his younger brother, Stan, built crystal sets and a one-valve radio.
When he graduated from high school in 1944, he was drafted into the US navy and spent his first 11 months being given what he described as "an excellent education in electronics". The fighting ended before he completed his training, but he served on a cruiser and visited Korea and China.
The GI Bill enabled him to study electronics at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), and after graduation he became a research assistant in the university's computer lab. There he worked under Jay Forrester on the valve-based Whirlwind computer – the first to show real-time data on a display – and America's Sage air defence system. He also led the development of computers based on transistors. Having learned how to build systems at MIT, Olsen decided to go into business.
In 1957 he and his colleague Harlan Anderson founded DEC in a disused woollen mill at Maynard, just outside Boston, and their first recruit was brother Stan. At the time, the data-processing industry was dominated by IBM, which installed and maintained room-filling million-dollar mainframes. DEC sold small, fast modules that smaller organisations, universities and even individuals could use, if they could write their own software. The modules led to the creation of the first stand-alone minicomputer, the PDP-1 (Programmed Data Processor-1), launched in 1960 for only $110,000. This was also the hardware on which the world's first video game, Spacewar!, was created – by Steve Russell at MIT.
The PDP range achieved worldwide success, particularly the PDP-8 – the bestselling computer of its day – and the PDP-11, for which the C programming language was written. In 1977 DEC went from 16-bit minis to 32-bit super-minis with the even more successful VAX range, investing $1bn to fight toe-to-toe against IBM. But by then, the minicomputer age was approaching its end and the microprocessor, or "computer on a chip", was starting to take over with the aim of making powerful computers by bundling cheap microprocessors together.
Other minicomputer companies such as Data General, Prime and Wang were also devastated. These four had been mainly responsible for creating the "Massachusetts Miracle" – a cluster of hi-tech companies around the Route 128 technology corridor near Boston. Only Hewlett-Packard went on to greater things, possibly because it was the founding company in Silicon Valley, California.
Olsen's engineering-based approach showed in his systematic notes of what he hoped for in a wife. When he was an undergraduate, a young Finnish woman, Eeva-Liisa Aulikki, came to stay with his next-door neighbour. They did not get on well, but in a summer break from MIT, Olsen got a job in a ball-bearing factory in Sweden, then set off for Finland to woo her. They were together for 59 years.
In 2003 the couple made a donation to establish the Ken Olsen Science Center at Gordon College in Massachusetts. Olsen was a long-term supporter of this Christian college, and had joined the evangelist Billy Graham on the board of trustees in 1961. Eeva-Liisa died in 2009. Their son Glenn also predeceased Olsen. He is survived by his daughter, Ava, his son, James, Stan and five grandchildren.
• Kenneth Harry Olsen, computer engineer and entrepreneur, born 20 February 1926; died 6 February 2011
He was a pioneer...
DEC was the single most best company I ever worked for.
The training and social climate of the company made business challenges a fun thing to deal with.
When Richie Quake, a vibrant 19-year-old engineering student, was found dead in his bed, his family was devastated. But when a conventional autopsy of the apparently healthy young man offered no answers, his parents were gripped by another medical concern: Could a silent but deadly condition be hiding in other members of the family?
Today, scientists at the Stanford School of Medicine are on a quest to find out, searching samples of Richie's tissue for genetic clues that might explain why the young man's heart suddenly stopped.
The "molecular autopsy" is believed the first time that whole-genome sequencing has been used to seek a cause of death, although the Stanford team has used more focused genetic scans to investigate 17 other sudden unexplained deaths.
Dr. Euan Ashley and his medical research team are scanning Richie's DNA for errors that might cause irregular beating of the heart, invisible during traditional dissection.
"We're applying new technologies to an age-old practice, trying to work out why someone died, after they died," said Ashley, who directs Stanford's Center for Inherited Cardiovascular Disease. Nearly half of healthy young people have normal findings at autopsy, so their deaths remain a mystery.
"Because so many of these conditions can be familial, it becomes more important for surviving relatives," he said. "This has the opportunity to save lives."
The team's data is still under analysis, and their
conclusions won't be published until later this year. But they say they are zeroing in on a set of suspect gene mutations linked to one particular type of rare and poorly understood cause of sudden cardiac death, caused by faulty electrical signaling in a beating heart.AdvertisementIf confirmed, the genomes of surviving family members could be searched for similar flaws, and their health monitored closely.
Deadly heart flutters
Richie Quake seemed to be in perfect health. It was a morning three years ago when the black belt in karate, with D.A.R.E. drug prevention posters on his wall, lingered in bed because he felt a little chilly. Later that day, the Drexel University student was scheduled to work at a nearby theme park, dressed in a Big Bird costume.
"I kissed him good night the night before when he gave me a shirt for my birthday," his father, Richard, told Stanford Medicine magazine. "My wife talked to him that morning. ... She said, 'OK, I love you,' and she kissed him goodbye."
Following an autopsy, the coroner blamed a fluttering heart, or arrhythmia. But that's a symptom, not a cause.
"He was a very bright teenager, very active, a good kid," recalls Stanford bioengineering professor Stephen Quake, a cousin of Richie's father. "It's been a very difficult experience for everyone, especially his immediate family, when there is no explanation, no closure.
"We wondered: Is there something we missed? For his sisters, and my kids, I wondered: What can we do for them to make sure we're taking the best care of them?"
Anguished by the unexplained death, Richie's father insisted the coroner collect both blood and tissue samples. "I told him, 'I need you to save everything you possibly can for future testing,' " Richard Quake, a sales manager for an Internet auto auction site, told Stanford Medicine. "At the time, I really had no idea why I said that."
Encouraged by cousin Stephen, who last year had his own genome sequenced for under $50,000 and published in the journal Lancet, Richard Quake sent tissue samples to Stanford.
Such cardiac death is generally linked to a problem in the pumping heart. The heart operates on electrical impulses that rhythmically stimulate the vessels, so blood can be pumped to the body. These electrical impulses are controlled by pores called "ion channels." Death can occur when the proteins for these ion channels do not function properly.
Scanning nucleotides
Stanford is not the only research facility searching, post-mortem, for killer genes. In Canada, a molecular autopsy of a 21-year-old college student found a genetic mutation that causes a heart problem called Long QT Syndrome. When tested, her mother was found to have the same mutation.
At the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota, Dr. Michael Ackerman has performed molecular autopsies of 49 young people who died suddenly. In seven cases, he found suspect mutations in a gene called RyR2, which regulates the influx of calcium into heart cells.
Such defects are dubbed "the perfect assassin" by Ackerman, because they leave no trace.
After Richie's death, his father sent his tissue to other university labs to see whether they could find known mutations. But tests came back negative.
So the Stanford team has expanded the search, using powerful computers to scan all 6 billion nucleotide letters in Richie's genome, focusing on regions that regulate proteins in the heart muscle. Since there's no formal list, it's a big undertaking. To make matters worse, such defects are rare; a mutation could even be unique to a single family.
So far they have identified 200 genetic variants in the young man's genome, many never before associated with disease. Which one was lethal? That's what the Stanford scientists hope to learn.
"It's a situation where we're as blind as we can be -- the sudden death of a healthy 19-year-old," Dr. Ashley said. "We have no other helpful side information."
Contact Lisa M. Krieger at 408-920-5565.
ANALYZING THE DATA
FINDINGS TO be published next year: The team is zeroing in on a set of suspect gene mutations linked to one particular type of rare and poorly understood cause of
sudden cardiac death, caused by faulty
electrical signaling in a beating heart.
WHAT IT COULD MEAN: If a link is found, surviving family members could be searched for the same mutation, and their health monitored more closely.
"US citizens should mobilize to defeat the current government proposal for an Internet “kill switch.”
We need to reverse some of the momentum toward a centralized Internet, or at least devise a peer-to-peer connectivity alternative."
A repository for my wandering mind...
